


But I Don't Wanna

by LexieCarver



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, pure fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-17
Updated: 2017-05-17
Packaged: 2018-11-01 23:58:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10932711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexieCarver/pseuds/LexieCarver
Summary: Pairing: Dean x Reader, Dean x LydiaBeta: @raspberrymamaWord Count:  1,768 (with lyrics)A/N: Pure fluff. This was written for @meganwinchester1999 300 Follower Challenge with the prompt, “Hey Brother by Avicii.” I know that some people are triggered by pregnancy so consider this a clue and a warning.





	But I Don't Wanna

[Also posted on Tumblr-](http://roxy-davenport.tumblr.com/post/160781934083/but-i-dont-wanna)

 

 

“It was just me, Mom, and Dad for a while now, well fours years to be exact but as a child that feels like a lifetime. And then boom, Mom said ‘you’re having a brother.’ Let’s just say I didn’t take it well. I went through so many emotions. The first one was anger. I had to share everything now, presents, love, and attention. It just wasn’t fair. Why would my parents do this to me? Did I do something wrong? Was I being punished? Every time they went to the room where Sammy would be in a few months, I felt jealous. Mom looked so happy. I wondered if she looked as happy when she had me in her belly. Sometimes I noticed that she was troubled here and there by decisions weighing on her. I saw her frown when she was feeding me, felt her unease when she was sitting by me. When I was older I understood it was due to her hunting life and a deal she made long ago. It had nothing to do with me but as a child you see every decision your parents make as a direct reflection on you. But parents are people too. We have our own desires and wants. We even make mistakes sometimes just like kids. As time went on, I learned to accept that I would be having a brother, I mean what else could I do really?”

 

“Why did your mom do it?”

 

 

“Have another child?”

 

 

Lydia nodded.

 

 

“Mom and Dad loved me, and kids in general. They wanted to have more kids because I think they loved the idea of raising them, of teaching them right from wrong and watching them grow up. Maybe they also liked the idea of leaving something behind, a legacy and a chance to impart wisdom on more kiddos. But as a child, I couldn’t understand any of that; I thought they didn’t love me, that I wasn’t enough. I assure you that was farthest from the truth.”

 

 

Dean smiled over to his left as he felt the bed shifting. Lydia moved from a seated position to a laying one staring up happily at Dean. He saw you in the doorway, the hall light shining on your hair making you look like the angel Dean thought you really were.

 

 

You smiled at Dean as he started talking to Lydia again.

 

 

“When Sam was born I had to admit that he looked cute and he looked so small, vulnerable… and bald.”

 

 

Lydia gasped.

 

 

“I know, “ Dean said dramatically. “The giant Sammy we all know and love with girl hair was the tiniest bald baby; ridiculous, right?”

 

 

Dean smiled as Lydia giggled at the thought.

 

 

 

“Well when Mom took him home and put him in the room, curiosity got the best of me. I came into his room to see why Mom was happier with him around. I looked down at my baby brother thinking that at one point, I must have looked that small. Sam looked so helpless. Dad seemed to understand my hesitancy with Sam and would give me tasks to do. Warm the bottle, feed Sam, hold him, comfort him, etc. I started each task moaning and groaning, asking why I had to do them but over time I welcomed them and really bonded with my brother.”

 

 

“Will I have to do tasks too?” Lydia asked worried.

 

 

Dean nodded at Lydia before continuing, “It took time of course, but I enjoyed having a brother. Sam was so helpless; he needed me to look after him. I got to be the big, smarter older brother taking care of my little brother. It was kinda cool. I promised my father I would look after him. That was my job and I took it seriously. I watched as he grew up hovering over him, especially since Mom was dead and Dad was MIA for weeks at a time. I got good at providing for us, hustling pool money, stealing food when we had to. I was Sam’s father more often than John ever was. I helped him with homework and talked to him about school and got in the face of any bullies that dared to be mean to my baby brother. The connection only grew stronger since it was us against the world. We couldn’t count on Dad; he was hardly ever there. I had to protect my brother from my father’s neglect and hunting in general. I didn’t want what Dad was doing to touch Sammy. Just like I don’t want it to touch you. I wanted to give him a chance at a normal life even if that meant that I had to deal with the darker side of life for my whole life; as long as Sam didn’t have to, I was happy. I had a responsibility that was forced on me but after a while I forced it on myself because there was no one else.”

 

 

“That sounds hard.”

 

 

“It was, Sweetpea.”

 

 

“When Dad disappeared, I needed Sam to help me and I brought him in because I couldn’t face all the darkness alone anymore. I wanted my brother at my side. I needed my family with me. He went from a burden to the only thing that reminded me of home; the only thing that comforted me and made me smile. My brother is my rock; we have each other’s backs no matter what. I would never be able to hunt without him.”

 

 

 

“But Daddy, how does that relate to me?”

 

 

You chuckled. “Your dad can be long-winded sometimes when he tells stories.”

 

 

Dean gave you bitchface but you shrugged with a smile.

 

 

“Dean and I will never leave you alone in hotel rooms for weeks at a time. You are cared for and cherished and there is no reason to feel jealous. We both love you so much and this baby isn’t going to change that. We have so much love to give. We can love you and this baby. The point of Daddy’s story is to show you that a sibling can be a blessing. The world is a dark place. You know what hunting is sadly because demons are actively hunting us, including you, Munchkin. You have powers Little One, big powers and bad people want you. But they will never get you because you have the fiercest parents ever. We will protect you at all costs. That being said, it is great to have family there with you when we can’t be. We aren’t going to live forever and this way you will never be alone in the world. You’ll always have a friend, someone to care about, someone who will love you unconditionally and someone who will understand you and be there through thick and thin. Friends and lovers come and go but family’s forever.”

 

 

Dean smiled at you and motioned for you to walk into the room. You stood at the edge of the bed holding a seated Dean’s hand. Lydia frowned at the both of you.

 

 

“But I don’t wanna brother.”

 

 

“I know Sweetpea, but promise us that you’ll think about what we said?” You implored.

 

 

Lydia pouted but nodded.

 

 

Dean thought for a moment before asking Lydia, “Would you feel better if you named your brother?”

 

 

Lydia perked up a little and shrugged pretending to be disinterested. Really she was excited. Naming the baby felt like a huge step, so much power in it and it kind of made the baby hers, sort of. At least that’s what her little kid brain thought.

 

 

“Maybe?” she said in a small voice trying to hide her smile. Her face changed into one of intense thought for an eight year old at least. “How about Lucas?”

 

 

You chuckled. “My, that’s an usual one. Where did you hear that name from?”

 

 

Lydia blushed. “Um… that’s Steven’s middle name.”

 

 

Dean chuckled. “Is it now?”

 

 

“Uh huh,” Lydia confirmed.

 

 

You and Dean traded knowing looks starting a little silent communication. You patted Dean’s shoulder before moving to the door to turn off the lights as Dean tucked Lydia in and kissed her forehead.

 

 

“Sweet dreams, Kiddo.”

 

 

“Sweet dreams, Daddy and Mommy. Thanks for the story.”

 

 

“It was supposed to be a short answer,” Dean whispered to you. You chuckled and playfully shook your head in response.

 

 

Dean turned on the night-light that shone stars on the ceiling, bathing the room in a soft blue light. Dean smiled and walked over to you walking out of the bedroom, slowly and quietly closing the door behind him. He placed his arm around your back.

 

 

“She’ll be just fine. We raised a good one. She’ll love Lucas.”

 

 

“With you and I as parents, how could she ever go wrong?”

 

 

Dean kissed you passionately before you both walked into your shared bedroom. You never thought you could have both; a happy future with children and a hunting life, but with Dean as your husband, you realized nothing was impossible.


End file.
